Chapter Fiftythree – Where Are Your Parents?

⚠️Trigger Warning. Religious views⚠️

Rumlow removes a couple of hairs away from your face. You open your eyes, and he gives you a smile.

– Welcome back..

You look around. You’re lying in the bed, a blanket over you.

– Back?

He kisses you.

– You fainted on me..

What? You fainted? Is that even possible?

– How… How long was I out?

Another kiss, another smile.

– A couple of minutes. Everything OK?

– Err.. Sure.. I.. I fainted?

He laughs a bit.

– Yes. That was something new.

– I fainted?

You mutter to yourself, as you roll over on your back. So that’s what you felt, when that euphoric feeling came over you. That was definitely something new.

Rumlow gets the blanket over himself as well, puts an arm around you.

– You know I love you, right?

You turn your head to look at him.

– Yes! And I love you too. Why do you ask?

He’s nervous. You can see it in his eyes.

– I’m sorry that I fainted. I didn’t mean to scare you.

Yet another kiss.

– That was fucking amazing, YN! You didn’t scare me. I got to take care of you. Like I want to do. Always.

– Then what is it?

He cleares his throat.

– Where are your parents?

You stare up at the ceiling again.

– Oh that… I should have known that this would come up at some point..

His arm holds you a bit tighter.

– You don’t have to tell me, YN. If it’s too hard.

– It’s not hard. Not like your story anyway. It’s actually kinda stupid.

– Do you want to talk about it?

You sit up. He sits up as well. Puts a hand on your back. You send him a little smile, before you get up from the bed, put some clothes on.

– I’ll tell you, Brock. But I really need food.

He gets up as well. Puts his sweatpants back on, before coming over to you, and wrapping you in a hug.

– I’ll order some food. Make yourself comfortable on the couch. Wine?

You look up at him, kiss him again.

– Wine sounds nice. And maybe some more of that Italian food.

– Italian food is it. Now go sit down.

About 30 minutes later, the food arrives. Rumlow sits down next to you, and puts some of the food on your plate. Hands you a glass of wine.

– So..

– Yeah.. My parents..

– Will I ever get to meet them?

You take a sip of your wine.

– I highly doubt it. Sorry.

– They’re still alive….. Right?

He sounds almost scared.

– Yes. They’re still alive…

You answer fast. Without thinking.

– If you can call it that…

You add..

– Bad people?

You take a breath.

– Err.. Not bad maybe. They’re overly religious. Like in a way I can’t even describe. I grew up with tons of rules and regulations. I felt smothered. So when I became a teenager…

You look at him. He takes your hand.

– I acted out. Went to parties, joyrides, blew up mailboxes… Stuff like that. And when I got my first boyfriend.. I ran away from home, with him. They found out of course. When you’re 16 years old, you’re not that good at hiding. Needless to say that relationship went to hell.

You take another sip of your wine. Rumlow isn’t saying anything. He’s just waiting for you to continue.

– Of course that didn’t help my rebellious faze. I got a new boyfriend. And… well.. Then our Minister found out that I lost my virginity. Don’t ask me how he found out. And well.. You’re supposed to wait with that until marriage. So I was thrown out of our congregation. And then…

You look at him again. How are you going to explaine this next part to him. You’ve always felt that everything that happened after that was your fault. That’s probably why you never asked for help. You just kept quiet, for years. What if he thinks so too.

– Yes?

He asks, while putting his arm around you.

– They gave me to David. He was a family friend. And.. Well they ment that he could take care of me. That he would eventually marry me, and make an honorable woman out of me. We all know how that went..

He pulls you into him. And you start to cry.

– I always thought everything was my fault. So I never asked for help. I told my parents the first time he assaulted me. They didn’t care. Said it was my punishment for turning my back to God.

He’s not saying anything. He just holds you. Protecting you. Like he always does. And he lets you cry out.

– So…

He cleares his throat.

– You haven’t been talking to them for..??

You look up at him. Dry your tears, and take another sip of the wine.

– Going on 10 years now. I was 19, when they handed me over to David. Not counting that phone call I made. I’m all alone, Brock.

Again he kisses you. A long kiss. Like he never wants to let you go.

– You’re not alone, YN! I’m here. I’ll always be here. With you. Always. Remember that!

You don’t know what to say. You know that he’s telling the truth. But the fear of being abandoned is stronger.

– And…

He continues. Contemplating is he should tell you this.

– Well. I’m Catholic. And I can tell you one thing for sure. What you went through with…. him….. That wasn’t a punishment from God. God doesn’t punish people.

You take another sip of your wine, Rumlow refills your glass.

– How do you know that? How can anyone know that? What if I’m just a bad person?

– You’re not a bad person, YN! And as to how I know that God doesn’t punish people. What could 8 year old me possibly have done to deserve that kind of punishment? God isn’t responsible for the bad things in the world. Sometimes bad shit just happens. It has absolutely nothing to do with the man upstairs.

You look at him again. He always manages to say all the right things at all the right times. How do you respond to this?

– Thanks for the wine..

He smiles.

– You’re welcome. But maybe we should eat a bit too.

– Yeah…

You say with a little laugh..

– Thanks for the food too.

You take a bite. It is if possible even better than last time. And it compliments the wine.

– Good?

– Perfect, Brock! Perfect.

He lets his hand rest on your thigh for a while, before you both go back to enjoying your food.

You’re happy that you told him. It’s been eating at you for some time now. The reason you left him that day in the apartment, and that night at the hotel. You were scared that he’d leave you. Just like everyone else in your life had done. But he’s still here. Even though he knows everything. He’s still here. Taking care of you, comforting you, protecting you. Maybe it’s time you start to believe that…